vil·lain·y
Wicked or criminal behavior.
When I think of villains I think of MFDOOM. I used his mask in my early weeks when launching FRENCH TOST. I did this because I love MF DOOM's philosophy on life and how he expressed it and shared it to the world. Six months later, this month I realized I've been the villain in my own life sometimes. When I came to this realization I was just in awe as it all just came together for me. Finally for the first time, I saw myself in the mirror. EGO DEATH. It was CINEMATIC.
I suddenly took the "mask off" and could see my own fingers pointing back at me. At that point I didn't have anyone to help me through the darkness. It seemed like even my own loved ones were apart of the rock throwing. The Mask, Ego Death, and all that I knew came to an end.
Aside from battling the real life Evil Witches from Disney fairytales, A living Jezebel, Copycat Bully type of low-vibrational energy, The Wicked Witch of the East, but....at the time, standing in the mirror eating an apple was also, me. This is where I gained my true inner power.
I could defeat the low vibrational villains but the best realization was stepping into knowing inner true self. When you know your shadow-self and your highest-self you become a true warrior. You can transmute any evil or darkness thrown your way and still win at the DUAL OF THE IRON MICS. (WU-TANG!)
YES, they actually were....however, I needed to heal something that resembled the witches who attacked me. I follow the Be a Good Human theory and trust in God. WHAT WAS THIS?! I was just trying to survive through a tough year.
IT WAS DOOMSDAY. Operation Doomsday.
WELL DONE! Bravo, Andrea... the show was over and the curtain was called. I emerged out of my dark knight of the soul AKA "Ego Death". (Plays Eminem's: Curtain Call). It was my EGO death that was only making me stronger. Discovering my gifts, fighting darkness, and the best part: God's faith only got stronger. I suddenly had exited the MATRIX. I was not surprised since I had been manifesting this, however the surprise was in the dark cold room in solitude.
“Endless moons, an opaque universe, thunder, tornadoes, the quaking earth. Rare moments of peace; forehead up against my knees, arms around my head, I thought, I listened, I longed not to exist. But life was there, a transparent pearl, a star revolving slowly on its own axis.”
― Shan Sa, Empress
Sometimes we're not all light and that's alright. But we just have to keep walking in the darkness. STAND UP and FIGHT! Whether you are fighting your EGO, ILLUSIONS, or DEMONS, or HUMANS. There is light at the end of that tunnel. Just like diamonds are made under pressure. SO will your highest self.
TRUST IN GOD, and just believe.
We are all human have beautiful souls in us. We just need to recognize that and empty the cup of poison we thought everyone and their mothers was out to get us to drink. Or perhaps we served it to ourselves unknowingly. The cup you poured yourself was not water. You had this illusion that the cup with poison was poured and handed to you by the evil witch. However, you realized... drum roll please.... it was you, the witch, and the whole clan pouring into the jungle juice.
It hit like a kung-fu kick right in the face. You start to see the self-sabotaging behaviors you had no idea you were exhibiting. It was easier to blame it on others and say "yea, yeah, that's it. It's them not me."
Nope. Open your eyes. Take the rose colored glasses off.
Self-awareness is beautiful
It's coming to a new sense of purpose, passion, and passion for who you really are. Solitude is instrumental for this. It's amazing actually. It's uncomfortable but it's necessary for anyone or thing to become great.
In solitude you hear the truth and know the solutions.
The light that we have is the only one we need. Resistance to the moment is key. Great discipline is needed to allow it to show us the way down the yellow brick road. The dark time is what will let us enjoy the time alone in the darkness. ✨
....continued
Xoxo,
AT